HATHOR.EA ASSOCIATED PRESS
MEDIA RELEASE (a bit long but worth the read)
EMBARGO: NONE (for immediate release)
DATE: 22 SEPTEMBER 2008
SUBJECT: PAKISTANI RELATIONSHIP BOMBS
Following a series of bomb blasts in Pakistan, the latest one being the Marriot Hotel, Islamabad, killing more than 60 people and injuring scores more, a similar attack has been rendered on the abode of Shair Mohammad and Simone Heradien. Fortunately both escaped with no physical injuries but the psychological impact has left an indelible mark.
Mr Mohammad, of Pakistani origin now a naturalised South African, and Ms Heradien, a thoroughbred and proudly SA citizen, had formerly been hit by a series of similar incidents. This time however both involved were not so lucky to escape as the bomb of approximately T7 magnitude (similar to hurricane Katrina and Ike) has caused an inseparable rift and division between the two nationalities. Previous impacts, had on those occasions, merely rendered cracks in the walls (ceiling, windows, floors, ad nauseam). Window dressing, especially the provision of rose-tinted coloured glasses to friends and acquaintances, were often used to soften the visual impact.
All the rose coloured glasses were destroyed in the latest blast and Ban-Ray has discontinued production of this specific brand. Discussions have ensued at the Nations of Unity, where a number of resolutions were proposed and one finally adopted. Resolution 160908. It has been decided by both nations to firstly declare a “détente”, followed by a cessation of hostilities and subsequently a cease fire, which will eventually lead to the signing of a peace accord. Preparations in this regard are imminent and a final separation will ensue. The time-frame has been determined as three weeks to a month. The two nations have in addition decided to remain together in the destroyed environment, in a culture of peace and understanding, until the determined separation date.
Says Ms Heradien: “Cultural diversity necessitates the need for continuous inter-cultural dialogue which in turn brings about a level of understanding, respect and commitment of acceptance of differences”. However after months of talks and round table discussions, utilising South Africa’s maxim with reference to the handling of conflict in foreign relations viz “quiet diplomacy”, the repeated response was primarily that of, (as used by amongst others a country which is facing presidential elections in November, and organisations which believe in the destruction of self to attain dogmas), war and attack. Although the South African represented in this matter at times tried this method as well but is unskilled in this approach.
Says Mr Mohammad: “The adaptation to the westernised cultural practices within a relationship viz equality and fraternity and the acceptance of especially non-sexism is completely foreign to me and entirely not within our foreign relations policy albeit that we have just embraced democracy. Our laws, cultural and otherwise, dictates that the woman has a specific place within a relationship and to tamper with the ‘laws of nature’ consequently has these repercussions. Perhaps there are men within my culture who are exceptions but they are very (very) few and far between. ”
Both parties would like to exclaim that the first half of the entire series and events leading up to international, inter-cultural relations, although fraught with its inherent problems, had been a rewarding, enriching, loving and exciting experience. Religious differences however were never much of an issue. But….sometimes love just does not conquer all.
In addition says Ms Heradien: “Rumours doing the rounds that I have been beguiling, alluring and charming some male members (of representatives of other nationalities present in Pretoria within a sector of the social circle I float in) to rise to the inculcation of the “strengthening of relations” between South Africa and themselves, are unfounded and borders on defamation of character”.
In addition Mr Mohammad has exclaimed that the rumour that he prefers the inherent consummation of horizontal Pakistan-Pakistan relations which is more befitting to his cultural practices are also unfounded. (And so preaches presidential candidates in our midst the sermon of ‘The Unfounded Rumour” as they face allegations of fraud, corruption and acquitted rape).
Strangely the Indian advisor, (India born and also a diplomat), of Ms Heradien had always vehemently exclaimed, at the time while he was in Cape Town, that a fully westernised, emancipated woman courting liaison with a man of conservative origin first generation immigrant within that western society, would eventually lead to disaster. I suppose neighbours normally have first hand experience of each other’s cultural relations.
An unidentified source has reported that they have seen Ms Heradien out “jolling” this weekend looking as sexy and striking as ever and conjuring up an intense conversation with a much younger man. When asked about her provoclivities she exclaimed that the Samantha in her of “$.e.x and the City” fame has resurfaced and Austin Powers helped her to recover her mojo.
Note: as this is the blog version of the media release and posted internationally most of the readers will not know me at all. I thus invite comments on inter-cultural, inter-religious relationships of any persuasion. Marriage, Life Partner, Living together, Concubine status etc etc. I prefer liberal open objective discussion as opposed to closed minded subjective and religious based dogmas.
END
For further information, interviews, exclusive photos etc kindly contact Simone Heradien via your respective mediums of contact methods. Kindly note that photos taken will exclusively be on cameras provided by her agent, fitted with soft focus filters, and air-brushed before publication. The publicity machine of this single woman always portrays the concept of “The Phoenix”
Issued by Hathor.EA
Consultants in Cultural Management and Public Relations
(reminds one of an expert “Shrink” who can not solve his/her own family problems)
P O Box 33135
Glenstantia
0010
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Monday, September 22, 2008
STAND UP AND THROW YOUR OWN PARTY
About 178 odd years or so ago Piet Retief, Pretorius and some other disgruntled Dutch Speaking Colonists (DSC) (I decided to give them politically correct (PC) names) of the then Cape Colony decided that they had had enough of these liberal English Speaking Governors (ESG also PC) who had then taken a tough stance against amongst other things, racial discrimanination in the Dutch Reformed Church thus allowing, as an example, Khoi Khoi's ect to get married (in the church) and (heavens)… receive the holy sacrements side by side with the Dutch speakers. The emancipation of slaves in 1834 was probably the final straw that broke the "oxen's" back, or nail in the coffin which saw them packing.
Of course the DSC were also disgruntled by the numerous farm attacks and the nonchalant way the ESG reacted to their appeals (has anything changed in SA context?) amongst other grievances. A strange fact was that initially the Dutch Reformed Church Synod strongly opposed the migration saying it would lead to "godlessness and a decline of civilisation" (Was this somehow prophetic re South's Africa's future under future DSC rule?) . Thus the DSC departed without official church leaders relying on American and Wesleyan missionaries to guide them to the path of righteousness [1]
And… Viola. "Die Groot Trek" (The Great Trek) rolled out with ossewa (ox wagon) wheels blazing through the outback of the then South Africa. Amazingly, it seems to have reared an amazing resurgence. Although of course most come blazing in on a trail of jet fuel
Recently, in the past odd months or so, there seems to be a startling amount of Capetonians doing the great trek up north to Gauteng. I'm starting to hear more and more djy instead of jy as I sortie through Menlyn Park (when I'm in mall cruising mode) , and getting those furtive recognition glances of "you also look as if your hair minces when subjected to constant cape sea air " Even more startling is that a large percentage are moving to Pretoria (Tswhane) In fact I've had two calls in one month from acquaintances requesting guidance as to the living conditions in the Jacaranda City. 6 friends/acquaintances have so far moved up in the past six months alone!!! I do feel quite honoured that they would have confidence in me to give an objective opinion. I suppose they are acutely aware that I firmly believe in the maxim “that a place is what you make of it”. Within the diplomatic community, wherein I sometimes roam, I often encounter many lamentations as to the lack of opera houses and tea gardens and metro subways and sprawling parks and of course the crime. Unfortunately the latter does tarnish the reputation of what could be a world class city. Even more unfortunate is that I have now been directly affected by the horrific incidents of crime in Gauteng. Or shall I say indirectly, directly.
I suppose I can now proclaim that I have passed the crucial initiation practice to living and coping with life in Gauteng. Sadly, I have been subjected to the unfortunate experience of being affected by a hijack. Fortunate that it was not me personally, but my partner Shair. In the parking lot in the CBD at gun point by two hijackers on the 26th August. Forced in the back seat they drove off. Habitually, Shair (being the economist that he is) never fills or even half fills his tank with petrol, which necessitated that the hijackers stopped to fill up – at Shair’s expense (the cheek hey!). It was then that he managed to escape as his door was, by divine providence, not locked (no central locking), managed to jab one of his attackers in the ribs (while still at gunpoint) open car door, back kicked the attacker and ran off to the safety of crowds.
Unhurt, (except of course emotionally) and very brave I think, he escaped. However, do not despair. There’s a happy ending to this story. The entire Pakistani community of Pretoria rallied around him and started their own investigation, following leads. (It was almost like a scene from CSI Pretoria. Shair had of course also reported the incident to the police. Thanks to this community spirit the Pakkies traced the car, informed the police and Shair now has his car back…intact. Was somewhere in Brits (a town in SA) deep within some or other “location”. And even better the criminals have been apprehended and even more better (pardon the English) Shair was given the opportunity to beat the living crap out of two of them before they were arrested. Not that I support violence with violence, and if it happens to me I would love to forgive and forget and turn the other cheek and practice all of those Quaker values. But now ja…you make your own assumptions as to how one must feel. Yes crime in Gauteng is a problem
Perhaps a fluke, luck, karma, kismet? However emigrant communities seem to be able to transpose some of their community spirit in order to make the city where they stay a better one. Community spirit which I think greatly lacks in most cities and especially in South African cities as we become more "westernised" not knowing our neighbours or even worse not wanting to know our neighbours. I hope it's a community spirit which the new “emigrants” or compatriots from Cape Town whose hair also “minces” will transpose to Pretoria.
Facebook (FB), that great social utility, now have a few groups specifically targeted at us Kaappies (slang Afrikaans for Capetonians) “immigrants”. Two I subscribe to are called “Capetonians In Jozi” (which of course extends to all, Kaapies in Gauteng) and “Classique Cape Town Style Parties in Gauteng” (which of course I must subscribe to). In addition a new club in Pretoria called “Time4Jazz” is introducing Cape Classic Jazz Evenings on Thursdays. And of course guess who knows the owner (and he’s a yummie Afrikaner Pretoria born and bred boytjie…nogal) and will be there at the inaugural Cape Jazz Evening… And wait….there’s more…if one has DSTV (SA pay network channels) one can, on the audio channel, tune into ….(insert drum roll) yes…KFM and listen to Irma G and Kia and Mehboob.
Not that there has been a lack of parties my side. Heavens no!!!. I am surely more busy in Pretoria (and Jozi) attending this function, that opening and this event. In fact about a month ago a ended up at an event on the wrong evening. Fortunately it was just a social engagement of a friend’s birthday party at a restaurant (OK..my Pretoria hang out – Rhapsody’s) so it was not too embarrassing as when I walked in the manager and hostess just recognized me as a regular and we could laugh our sides off at my blond moment. The bright side, I could redo myself again the following evening. Now I religiously enter each and every event the minute I receive in both cell phones…with reminders. One the day before and the other cell about four – two hours before.
I think one of the highlights thus far was being invited to the Malibongwe Dialogues. Now girl…. if one gets invited to that you know that you have made it on the A list as far as women's month (August) events goes in Gauteng. Had the honour to be seated in the VIP section right next to Grace Machels' table on the one side and Frene Ginwhala's table on the other. The host at the table I was seated was assigned as Preggs Govender. For those foreign international nationals Preggs Govender is one of our foremost gender activists in SA. Oh yes, Cheryl Carolus was also in attendance as well as acting as a facilitator and Basetsana Khumalo (née Makghamela(?)) former Miss SA and now producer of Top Billing etc was there as well. Also seems I’m moving in the same circles as Mimi Coertse (google her). We keep on bumping into each other at events and as I greeted her at the Pavarotti tribute the other evening (it was the commemoration of his death one year ago) I whispered in her ear that I have now become her official stalker. She just chuckled.
I've also recently discovered Johannesburg North's amazing nightlife. OK, I’ve been here three years but better late than never. (Rivonia Strip, Rivonia Crossing, Sandton, Fourways areas) Having made a good couple of great friends including my posse of Sex and the (Pretoria) City (Girls) (check out my Facebook photo album called "Les Filles") and some amazing buddies from the diplomatic community.
Now one of Pretoria’s closely guarded secrets are the myriad diplomatic events which are hosted almost weekly. I’m specifically referring to the myriads of cultural events the missions host. I’m grateful to be on most of their mailing lists for invites to these events. Then there is also the Pretoria Diplomatic Association (PDA) of which I am an associate member. I’ve recently had the honour to be appointed as the events liaison to manage the quarterly PDA Ladies Cocktail Soirées. The inaugural one was held on the 12 August as a Women’s Month event. Opened by H E Cllr Louise Brutus of Liberia with Key Note Speaker Elize Lotter speaking on the life of Sandra Laing, it was an excellent event. Lost to organise but a great event. My article I wrote on the event was published in the Foreign Exchange which is the community tabloid of the diplomatic missions and DFA. And if you want to know who Sandra Laing is. She is the coloured woman born to white Afrikaner parents. Read up on her on http://www.whenshewaswhite.com/. The movie called, Skin, based on her life, has just been accepted and premiered at the Toronto Film Festival this past weekend. I’ve been tasked to realise one of Sandra’s dreams which is to meet Mr Mandela. In consultation with the Nelson Mandela Foundation at present and will keep you posted.
As you can see constantly busy. I specifically want to thank all my new friends in Pretoria for the amazing social life which through me reaching out and making their acquaintance and there magnanimous reciprocation have bestowed on me many wonderful weekends, cultural week evenings and loads more parties and fun times to come. I constantly take some initiative to razzle up an email or sms and moot an activity to do. Often it is reciprocated. I think this sums up my illustration of a place being what you make of it. One can either sit and mop and lament the provinciality of Pretoria (which really it is not these days) or….stand up and throw your own party. .
Much love
Simone
[1] New History of South African - 2007
Of course the DSC were also disgruntled by the numerous farm attacks and the nonchalant way the ESG reacted to their appeals (has anything changed in SA context?) amongst other grievances. A strange fact was that initially the Dutch Reformed Church Synod strongly opposed the migration saying it would lead to "godlessness and a decline of civilisation" (Was this somehow prophetic re South's Africa's future under future DSC rule?) . Thus the DSC departed without official church leaders relying on American and Wesleyan missionaries to guide them to the path of righteousness [1]
And… Viola. "Die Groot Trek" (The Great Trek) rolled out with ossewa (ox wagon) wheels blazing through the outback of the then South Africa. Amazingly, it seems to have reared an amazing resurgence. Although of course most come blazing in on a trail of jet fuel
Recently, in the past odd months or so, there seems to be a startling amount of Capetonians doing the great trek up north to Gauteng. I'm starting to hear more and more djy instead of jy as I sortie through Menlyn Park (when I'm in mall cruising mode) , and getting those furtive recognition glances of "you also look as if your hair minces when subjected to constant cape sea air " Even more startling is that a large percentage are moving to Pretoria (Tswhane) In fact I've had two calls in one month from acquaintances requesting guidance as to the living conditions in the Jacaranda City. 6 friends/acquaintances have so far moved up in the past six months alone!!! I do feel quite honoured that they would have confidence in me to give an objective opinion. I suppose they are acutely aware that I firmly believe in the maxim “that a place is what you make of it”. Within the diplomatic community, wherein I sometimes roam, I often encounter many lamentations as to the lack of opera houses and tea gardens and metro subways and sprawling parks and of course the crime. Unfortunately the latter does tarnish the reputation of what could be a world class city. Even more unfortunate is that I have now been directly affected by the horrific incidents of crime in Gauteng. Or shall I say indirectly, directly.
I suppose I can now proclaim that I have passed the crucial initiation practice to living and coping with life in Gauteng. Sadly, I have been subjected to the unfortunate experience of being affected by a hijack. Fortunate that it was not me personally, but my partner Shair. In the parking lot in the CBD at gun point by two hijackers on the 26th August. Forced in the back seat they drove off. Habitually, Shair (being the economist that he is) never fills or even half fills his tank with petrol, which necessitated that the hijackers stopped to fill up – at Shair’s expense (the cheek hey!). It was then that he managed to escape as his door was, by divine providence, not locked (no central locking), managed to jab one of his attackers in the ribs (while still at gunpoint) open car door, back kicked the attacker and ran off to the safety of crowds.
Unhurt, (except of course emotionally) and very brave I think, he escaped. However, do not despair. There’s a happy ending to this story. The entire Pakistani community of Pretoria rallied around him and started their own investigation, following leads. (It was almost like a scene from CSI Pretoria. Shair had of course also reported the incident to the police. Thanks to this community spirit the Pakkies traced the car, informed the police and Shair now has his car back…intact. Was somewhere in Brits (a town in SA) deep within some or other “location”. And even better the criminals have been apprehended and even more better (pardon the English) Shair was given the opportunity to beat the living crap out of two of them before they were arrested. Not that I support violence with violence, and if it happens to me I would love to forgive and forget and turn the other cheek and practice all of those Quaker values. But now ja…you make your own assumptions as to how one must feel. Yes crime in Gauteng is a problem
Perhaps a fluke, luck, karma, kismet? However emigrant communities seem to be able to transpose some of their community spirit in order to make the city where they stay a better one. Community spirit which I think greatly lacks in most cities and especially in South African cities as we become more "westernised" not knowing our neighbours or even worse not wanting to know our neighbours. I hope it's a community spirit which the new “emigrants” or compatriots from Cape Town whose hair also “minces” will transpose to Pretoria.
Facebook (FB), that great social utility, now have a few groups specifically targeted at us Kaappies (slang Afrikaans for Capetonians) “immigrants”. Two I subscribe to are called “Capetonians In Jozi” (which of course extends to all, Kaapies in Gauteng) and “Classique Cape Town Style Parties in Gauteng” (which of course I must subscribe to). In addition a new club in Pretoria called “Time4Jazz” is introducing Cape Classic Jazz Evenings on Thursdays. And of course guess who knows the owner (and he’s a yummie Afrikaner Pretoria born and bred boytjie…nogal) and will be there at the inaugural Cape Jazz Evening… And wait….there’s more…if one has DSTV (SA pay network channels) one can, on the audio channel, tune into ….(insert drum roll) yes…KFM and listen to Irma G and Kia and Mehboob.
Not that there has been a lack of parties my side. Heavens no!!!. I am surely more busy in Pretoria (and Jozi) attending this function, that opening and this event. In fact about a month ago a ended up at an event on the wrong evening. Fortunately it was just a social engagement of a friend’s birthday party at a restaurant (OK..my Pretoria hang out – Rhapsody’s) so it was not too embarrassing as when I walked in the manager and hostess just recognized me as a regular and we could laugh our sides off at my blond moment. The bright side, I could redo myself again the following evening. Now I religiously enter each and every event the minute I receive in both cell phones…with reminders. One the day before and the other cell about four – two hours before.
I think one of the highlights thus far was being invited to the Malibongwe Dialogues. Now girl…. if one gets invited to that you know that you have made it on the A list as far as women's month (August) events goes in Gauteng. Had the honour to be seated in the VIP section right next to Grace Machels' table on the one side and Frene Ginwhala's table on the other. The host at the table I was seated was assigned as Preggs Govender. For those foreign international nationals Preggs Govender is one of our foremost gender activists in SA. Oh yes, Cheryl Carolus was also in attendance as well as acting as a facilitator and Basetsana Khumalo (née Makghamela(?)) former Miss SA and now producer of Top Billing etc was there as well. Also seems I’m moving in the same circles as Mimi Coertse (google her). We keep on bumping into each other at events and as I greeted her at the Pavarotti tribute the other evening (it was the commemoration of his death one year ago) I whispered in her ear that I have now become her official stalker. She just chuckled.
I've also recently discovered Johannesburg North's amazing nightlife. OK, I’ve been here three years but better late than never. (Rivonia Strip, Rivonia Crossing, Sandton, Fourways areas) Having made a good couple of great friends including my posse of Sex and the (Pretoria) City (Girls) (check out my Facebook photo album called "Les Filles") and some amazing buddies from the diplomatic community.
Now one of Pretoria’s closely guarded secrets are the myriad diplomatic events which are hosted almost weekly. I’m specifically referring to the myriads of cultural events the missions host. I’m grateful to be on most of their mailing lists for invites to these events. Then there is also the Pretoria Diplomatic Association (PDA) of which I am an associate member. I’ve recently had the honour to be appointed as the events liaison to manage the quarterly PDA Ladies Cocktail Soirées. The inaugural one was held on the 12 August as a Women’s Month event. Opened by H E Cllr Louise Brutus of Liberia with Key Note Speaker Elize Lotter speaking on the life of Sandra Laing, it was an excellent event. Lost to organise but a great event. My article I wrote on the event was published in the Foreign Exchange which is the community tabloid of the diplomatic missions and DFA. And if you want to know who Sandra Laing is. She is the coloured woman born to white Afrikaner parents. Read up on her on http://www.whenshewaswhite.com/. The movie called, Skin, based on her life, has just been accepted and premiered at the Toronto Film Festival this past weekend. I’ve been tasked to realise one of Sandra’s dreams which is to meet Mr Mandela. In consultation with the Nelson Mandela Foundation at present and will keep you posted.
As you can see constantly busy. I specifically want to thank all my new friends in Pretoria for the amazing social life which through me reaching out and making their acquaintance and there magnanimous reciprocation have bestowed on me many wonderful weekends, cultural week evenings and loads more parties and fun times to come. I constantly take some initiative to razzle up an email or sms and moot an activity to do. Often it is reciprocated. I think this sums up my illustration of a place being what you make of it. One can either sit and mop and lament the provinciality of Pretoria (which really it is not these days) or….stand up and throw your own party. .
Much love
Simone
[1] New History of South African - 2007
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